Impossible to be misunderstood

Quintilian

Back in my college days, in a Survey of Spanish Literature class, I discovered the Spanish author Azorín, who would become one of my favorite writers. A sentence he wrote about how to write became my watchword:

No basta hacerse entender; es necesario aspirar a no poder dejar de ser entendido.

It is not enough to make yourself understandable, it is necessary to aspire to be unable to be misunderstood.

More recently, I’ve been studying Latin (you never know when you’ll need to summon a demon), and I came upon this quote by Quintilian, a Roman educator whose lessons have never been forgotten:

Quare non, ut intelligere possit, sed, ne omnino possit non intelligere, curandum.

It is not enough to use language that may be understood, but to use language that must be understood.

Down a rabbit hole, I discovered that this sentence comes from Quintilian’s discussion of strategies of persuasion, in particular how to persuade someone who may be distracted while you speak. His advice has been an inspiration to many people right up to our own 21st century. Apparently Azorín came upon it somehow, and it inspired him, too.

However, I later came upon a corollary that has proven to be true uncountable times, sadly — so good luck out there:

Anything that can be misunderstood has been misunderstood.

I’ll have a few things to say about dogs on Monday

I’ll be one of the readers at this month’s Gumbo Fiction Salon, 7 p.m. Monday, October 13, upstairs at the Galway Arms Irish Bar and Restaurant, 2442 N. Clark Street, Chicago. Free Admission. This edition is a special goodbye to Tina Jens, founder of the event, who is moving to New Orleans.

As a tribute to Tina’s delight in dogs, I’ll read three pieces about our canine companions: a flash fiction short story called Dogs in Heaven, the poem Sonnet for Six, and a 50-word unpublished story called “Good Boy.”

But I’m only one of many outstanding readers and performers! The Galway Arms also has fine food and drink. If you can come, you’ll have a great time.

International Translation Day: some of my translations

September 30 is International Translation Day, a celebration recognized by the United Nations, which is particularly fond of translators. It’s the feast day of St. Jerome, the patron saint of translators, known for his translation of the Bible into Latin from Greek.

Here’s a list of my translations for the past ten years, mostly science fiction and fantasy along with a few other interesting works.

Online: read for free

“Proxima One” by Caryanna Reuven — Short story. A machine intelligence called Proxima One sends probes into the galaxy on long journeys filled with waiting and yearning as they search for intelligent life. Clarkesworld Magazine, May 2025

“Bodyhoppers” by Rocío Vega — Short story. Minds can hop from body to body, but there’s always a problem because the system is designed to create them. Now you have no home, and you’re still madly in love. Clarkesworld Magazine, February 2025

“The Coffee Machine” by Celia Corral-Vázquez — Short story. A coffee vending machine acquires consciousness, then things go ridiculously wrong. I giggled as I translated it. It was a finalist for Clarkesworld’s 2024 Best Short Story. Clarkesworld Magazine, December 2024

“Francine (draft for the September lecture),” by Maria Antónia Marti Escayol — Short story. Renée Descartes’s daughter dies, and he and his fellow scientists try to bring her back to life using 17th-century science. Apex Magazine, December 28, 2021

“Embracing the Movement” by Cristina Jurado — Short story. A wandering hive of spacefaring beings encounters a lone traveler, and its members reach out to share their struggle for survival. Clarkesworld Magazine, June 2021

Decree by King Ferdinand and Queen Isabel — Translation of a document signed by the King and Queen of Spain in 1491. I made the translation for an auction house, and I also provided the historical context for the decree, which granted land to an impoverished soldier during a time crucial to Spanish history.

Amadis of Gaul — My serialized translation of the medieval novel of chivalry that inspired Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes. When the printing press was invented, the novel became a best-seller.

Available for purchase

ChloroPhilia by Cristina Jurado — Novella. Would you sacrifice your humanity to save the world? The story was nominated for Spain’s Ignotus Award. Apex Books, January 2025

Canyonlands: A Quarantine Ballad by JB Rodríguez Aguilar — Literary novella. A photojournalist on his way home in March 2020 finds himself quarantined due to the covid pandemic in a hotel room in Madrid, Spain, and he retreats to memories of a trip to Canyonlands National Park in Utah. Olympia Publishers, November 2023

“Embracing the Movement” by Cristina Jurado — Short story in a collection of stories, Alphaland and Other Tales. Spacefaring beings encounter a lone traveler, and the beautiful imagery hides horrors. Alphaland won the Fantasy Hive 2023 Year-End Award for Best in Translation. Calque Press, September 2023

“Team Memory” by Carme Torras — Short story in an anthology. A basketball teammate winds up on death row, but should he be there? European Science Fiction #1: Knowing the Neighbours, June 2021

“Francine (draft for the September lecture)” by Maria Antónia Marti Escayol — Short story in an anthology. Renée Descartes’s daughter dies, and he and his fellow scientists try to bring her back to life. World Science Fiction #1: Visions to Preserve the Biodiversity of the Future, August 2019

“Techt” by Sofia Rhei — Short story in a collection. An old man living in poverty in a hostile future strives to maintain what literature and “long” language can offer humanity. Everything Is Made Out of Letters, March 2019

Three short story translations: “Francine (draft for the September lecture),” by Maria Antónia Marti Escayol — Descartes’s daughter dies, and he and his fellow scientists try to bring her back to life. “Wake Up and Dream, by Josué Ramos — An old man, revived from cryosleep, tries to grow accustomed to a now-distopic Madrid, although something has gone strangely wrong. “Tis a Pity She Was a Whore,” by Juan Manuel Santiago — The music of David Bowie during cancer chemotherapy results in a divergent reality. Supersonic magazine, #9, December 2017

“The Story of Your Heart,” by Josué Ramos — Short story. People can get transplants to fix or improve themselves, or they can become donors by choice or force. Nominated for a 2017 British Science Fiction Award. Steampunk Writers Around the World, Volume I, Luna Press Publishing, August 2017

The Twilight of the Normidons, by Sergio Llanes — Novel set in an alternate Europe. A Rome-like empire teeters after three thousand years of domination by the Sforza dynasty as rebellions threaten its borders and treason weakens it from within. Dokusou Ediciones, August 2016

“The Dragoon of the Order of Montesa, or the Proper Assessment of History” by Nilo María Fabra — Short story in an anthology. The remains of a soldier who had been guarding Madrid’s Royal Palace are discovered far in the future. Triangulation: Lost Voices anthology, July, 2015

Unavailable or out of print

Canción Antigua – An Old Song: Anthology of Poems by Vicente Núñez — Translation with Christian Law. Vicente Núñez (1926-2002) was one of the most daring and important poets of Andalusia, Spain, in the second half of the 20th century. Fundación Vicente Núñez, April 2018

Confusion of Confusions by Joseph de la Vega — Non-fiction. Originally published in 1688 in Amsterdam, this Baroque-era book was the first to examine the wiles of a stock market, “where a man spends his life battling misfortunes and wrestling the fates.” Published by the Comisión Nacional del Mercado de Valores (Spanish Stock Exchange Commission) for use as an institutional gift, December 2016

Prodigies, by Angélica Gorodischer — An enchanting novel about the lives that pass through an elegant nineteenth century boarding house. Considered Gorodischer’s best novel. Small Beer Press, August, 2015

 Go Ahead — Write This Story: Ideas

Be the Bard.

Long ago and far away (in the late 1990s in Milwaukee), I wrote a column about writing called “Go Ahead — Write This Story” for a local science fiction zine.

I’ve decided to revive the column as a regular feature here. Let us begin:

So — you have an idea for a story. How do you develop it? There’s no easy way, but you might consider these questions: What important thing is at stake? Who are the characters, and what are their desires and motives? What complications will arise for your characters? How will they act and react to each other? How can you dramatize their conflict with a series of scenes? Remember: “plot” is a verb.

● This is a young adult novel which begins when settlers in orbit around Venus miss horses and decide to add equine-like artificial intelligence to their transportation pods.

● This is a sociological thriller about robots who discover that recent temporary “deactivations” were suicides.

● This is an elfish story in which old prairie dogs learn new tricks, which has repercussions for tourism in South Dakota.

Why I don’t use AI

Clanker

I don’t use AI because I’m lazy.

My job as a writer and translator is to produce excellence. Let me use translation as an example of how AI creates extra work because it’s easy to explain, and I really am lazy.

You may know that an AI can produce a translation that might be passably correct, although it will sound “off” in certain ways. I could use that as a first draft and fix it, right?

Sure. But it’s faster and easier to do it right the first time. If I fix an AI first draft, I have to go over every single word just as if I were translating it on my own, sometimes reviewing it several times, to drag it into excellence. Fixing AI slop is like flying from Chicago to New York and changing planes in Miami. I prefer a direct flight. I also prefer airplane pilots who have not ingested hallucinogens.

I’ve been writing professionally for more than a half century, and I’ve learned how to do a lot of things because I’ve done them uncounted times, but I still learn something new every single time I write anything. Using an AI would be like sending someone to the gym for me. I wouldn’t get stronger. Although I am lazy, I will work hard at writing because that’s how I pay the rent — and because I enjoy writing so much that I want to excel.

Striving for excellence is satisfying. Look at the faces of sweaty athletes on the field during a game. They’re having the time of their lives.

***

Rant over. If you want further rants, here are some curated links:

AI Killed My Job: Translators – by Brian Merchant

The Value of Human Translation – American Translators Association

Best Translation Apps: A Translator Puts Four to the Test – American Translators Association

Humans are being hired to make AI slop look less sloppy – NBC News

As AI Gets Smarter, It Acts More Evil – by Ted Gioia

Time to Play … !! SPOT THE BOT !! – Writer Unboxed

AI Spam – The Encyclopedia of Science Fiction

Criticism in the Age of AI – by Lincoln Michel

Artificial Intelligence and Ethics – Delancyplace

Word of the week: Clanker – by Nancy Friedman – Fritinancy

The Internet Is Turning You Into Someone You’d Hate IRL – WebMD

Could AI Data Centers Drain Lake Michigan? – The Block Club Chicago Podcast